Saturday, October 16, 2010
"I am what you can become"
On October 11th, I went on a journey in the Aboriginal sense. A journey is a bit like a combination between a meditation and lucid dream. It is actually a form of meditation. I did two journeys on the 11th; one for me and the other for a friend, though anyways, on to my journey.
I stood on a hill facing an African village of little homes with domed thatched roofs and as I became more aware of my surroundings, I noticed an Indian woman before me. The village wasn't in Africa nor was the woman from India, they only gave the slight impressions that they were from those areas. The woman was the wise village healer. She wasn't old or young, her presence evoked a sense of strength as well as a natural beauty. The healer was garbed in a brown, rimless, cloth hat with a white top. She also wore a brown, ankle length skirt. The woman spoke to me, "I am you. I am what you can become" and a second later we were in her home.
We sat on the floor, facing each other and talked. As we talked, a small brown monkey came into the healer's home to have her pet him. When I asked about the monkey, she said, "He is my friend and teacher." Then she told me to trust myself, have faith in myself and follow my heart. She sensed my difficulties with trusting myself, then she asked me to hold her hands because she wanted to show me something. I took her hands and everything went dark.
When my senses adjusted to the darkness, I noticed that I was standing outside in what appeared to be a post-apocalyptic time. In front of me stood, a slightly older version of myself. The older version of me was dressed in dark leather armour like he was some kind of warrior. My elder self appeared to be warding something off with a pointed, wooden staff.
I then found myself in a cave where I spotted a shirtless, elderly man with dark, shoulder length hair and a full beard sitting on the floor near the mouth. The man told me that I was about to play a game. To start the game, I had to light a candle using the resources that were around me. I lit the candle with my mind, I told the man that I already knew the rules to the game and then went deeper into the cave.
I walked around for a bit until I saw an image on the cave wall. The image was of a future me, my man and our two young kids playing in the green grass. The image instilled in me great love, joy, reassurance and excitement. The scene on the wall appeared to be fluid and moving. It was as if I was looking into a pool of water. I touched the image and I was transported to another area of the cave, then I got the chance to talk with the warrior version of me.
My warrior self said that we can have everything we desire, I just have to believe. He goes on to say that I must believe that I am able to help humanity and that I am indeed here to do so. I must trust that I am capable of having everything I want. "..and you are capable Andre. I am living proof of that. If you have any more doubts and fears, you should surrender them on the cross like our brother did." As he said those last few words, I had a vision of me topless on the cross. As my warrior self spoke, we stood holding each other's gaze. I looked into his eyes and felt immense love, strength and compassion flowing in and around him. I noticed that our partner was asleep on the stone bed behind my warrior self. I mentioned something about being a warrior, my other self stated that he was a healer and that he didn't use words like warrior anymore. Then two little kids came running over to me with their happy cry of "Dada" and I knelt down so I was on their level. "Are these our kids?" The other me smiled and said, "we are of value to our world Andre, you just have to believe..and you can come back anytime you want."
The message of this journey is clear; in order to do and be what I want in life, I just have to believe in myself.